I was scheduled for a 16-mile long run. Thankfully I started this marathon training LONG ago in November and have taken a few breaks here and there with the weather, sickness, etc. It's coming up on crunch time where I do not have a lot of "wiggle room" to make up runs. YIKES! I honestly don't feel strong enough to run a marathon, but I'll somehow finish it on May 5th.
Hopefully from here on out, it'll be warmer, like normal temps...50s and 60s. That would be fantastic for the last month of training so I can honestly just move on from this experience.
I know, I know...it's all about the journey, etc., and I get it. I should also be thankful for what I can do, and I am. I know you have to put the work in, and I have not. You get stronger, you become more confident, all that. I just am not there, to be completely honest. My body hurts, I lack the motivation, my feet are in extreme pain while I run the long runs. I pray about it a lot. I know I do not HAVE to do it, but I want to, to do something a lot of people have not done. Being completely truthful, I want this to say I've done something a lot of others have not.
I am sort of in a new season in my life that I have other thoughts running through my brain and not on training (more on that later). I want to get through this, say I've completed 26.2, and focus more on strength training, losing body fat, and running 13.1 miles. I LOVE those so much more. I will be thankful for what I have done during these last few months, to proudly have that 26.2 sticker on my car, a shiny medal showing that I went through a lot, dream that again someday I'll do this race again.
If you think about it in the next month, say a little prayer for me to have the strength not only physically but mostly mentally to push through, to run with little to no pain, remember that I have a gift to do this while others do not.
No comments:
Post a Comment